Research confirms that a satisfying sex life is one of the main keys to lasting marriage. Yes, during the honeymoon period, it's not difficult to feel sexy and excited - but after years, the bed can be complicated. To help you and your partner still be able to maintain household intimacy, avoid the following mistakes.
Various problems that can damage household intimacy
1. Obvious to appearance
Ignores appearance not only about natural physical changes due to aging, or an additional two kilos on the scale. This is even more so for you who stop making efforts to dress up extra and take care of yourself for the sake of your partner. Don't get me wrong, your partner is actually very conscious, you know, when you do this. Being annoyed with the same appearance gives the impression that you don't care anymore to spoil your partner's eyes.
But this is not just to please the couple; taking care of yourself makes you comfortable with your own body. In addition, your libido will depend a lot on your overall body health. Therefore, exercise! Occasionally, haircut and beard, never dress up and wear nice clothes even if you just relax at home. Do whatever makes you feel sexy and he is guaranteed to glance.
2. Sex is only for special days
If you want to have a satisfying sex life, you must prioritize sex with other important aspects of your life. For example, you spend time on sports, friends, work and children. Now you also need to spend to be alone with your partner in the room.
Not that you have to enter a specific schedule for sex, but at least you will be able to steal time to feel sexy, intimate, and continue to enrich your relationship with him. Instead of thinking of scheduled sex as an activity that seems compulsory and not romantic, think about how waiting for the H-day is a better way to play all your fantasies. Sending sexy chats, for example, or planning what you will wear, and so on. Scheduling sex may conflict spontaneously, but it works.
3. Too many demands
Men always misunderstand that sex in porn films reflects sex in real life, even though it is very different. There is nothing wrong with watching porn movies occasionally to help arouse your sexual desires, but don't assume that only because you see the actress and actor involved in extreme sex sessions, that this is also what your partner wants. Often women do not want to feel obliged to appear and look like adult film actors. Porn films are not realistic, and aggressive actions can actually make them sick and uncomfortable. So it's no wonder more and more women are "giving up" and choosing to fake orgasms.
Let your partner know how to satisfy themselves. It's okay to have a very specific and concrete discussion; what you and he likes, which ones don't. But, on the other hand, respect the fact that just because you are passionate doesn't mean he wants and is willing to grant your request. Men have the right to complain of fatigue, stress, not mood or interest, or maybe they don't feel confident so they just want to hug; so do women. However, if you want to try to ignite his passion, remember that foreplay and seduction is also effective for men as well as for women.
4. Pretending to orgasm
Women are not the only experts who fake orgasms. More than 25 percent of men admit sometimes to pretend too. We pretend to orgasm for various reasons, and this might lead your partner to the wrong path.
Even though you may not mean badly, over time this can be a bad habit that leads to mistrust, anger, and hatred. It's still easier to open up and talk about what's the problem behind the blanket. To break out of your pretending habits, you have to find out what you really like, and learn to focus on your own pleasure first.
5. Stuck routine
Sometimes sex can become very familiar so by closing your eyes you already know what your partner will do next. You and your partner know the point of each stimulus, what kind of maneuver can bring orgasm quickly, and so on. On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with this; continue this satisfying sex session. But, it is not uncommon for couples to turn around in that routine, so sex is no longer as hot as it used to be. They are just not sure if they have to change, are afraid to hurt their partner's feelings, and don't know how to change them.
Humans tend to like a mixture of predictable things, and new things that surprise. Be open with your partner so you can express yourself sexually in various ways, but you also have to find the right balance between being an adventurous couple and "safe". Don't be so conventional that sex becomes boring. But don't be too wild so you lose both intimacy or your level of comfort. This can mean from a new sex position, to the attitude and body language you bring to bed.
Something simple but spontaneous, such as moving to the living room, kitchen or bathroom can add the desired spice of passion (but don't forget to leave the child with his aunt and aunt so they don't catch you both! ) Or, just leave the house, for example, rent a room in a hotel. "Many couples report that they have satisfying sex when they are not at home," Dr. Zdrok Wilson said, quoted by Woman’s Day.
6. Skipping sex is only because "not in the mood"
Indeed, it's natural for you or your partner to feel unwell, stressed out, or not in the mood to have sex. On the other hand, if you wait for the right time to make love until your body is fit and has plenty of time, your intimate session schedule might not be real for years to come. In addition, for many people, especially women, new desires arise after there is passion, not vice versa. That is, once the body shows one or two signs of sexual arousal, you may find yourself wanting sex more than you think.
Just spontaneously and do it. Maybe you will feel relieved when you have done it. If you are really preoccupied with office and other household routines, in a short time, you can still do a quickie. Any short sexual contact can strengthen your relationship and your partner and can relieve stress in your marriage. Sex also helps release endorphins and dopamine, serotonin, and other chemicals in the brain that can help you manage stress and help you sleep better.
7. Avoid the topic of sex in chat both
To have a great sex life, you must talk about activities in bed. And even though sex is easier to do than talk about, this awkward conversation is very important for a hot sex life. None of the experts can tell you what sex is right for you or your partner, except yourself. Thus, the only way to know is to talk openly about all of your wishes and concerns.
If you feel that your home and bedroom life is problematic, it's time for you to speak up. Your partner is not a mind reader expert, so are you. Follow these three steps to make it easy to start this difficult conversation: give praise, listen, share. And remember that you don't have to go through these three steps at a time.
Sincerity to listen to a partner, embrace weaknesses and worries, and empathize with their needs can be the main key to the continuity of husband and wife. Quality relationships not only require a satisfying sex life, but also a strong emotional connection outside the bed.
- Causes of Bloody Vagina After Sexual Relationship
- How Many Calories Are Burned Through Sex?
- Benefits and Risks of Swallowing Sperm during Oral Sex