Not infrequently breaking up with a lover can cause depression. Broken heart does hurt for some people, so it's natural for someone to feel depressed. Especially if what happens is not just a breakup, but a divorce.
Depression due to broken hearts often occurs in young people. Quoted by Health Line, many young people in the United States decide to commit suicide because of depression after a broken heart with their partner. Every year, nearly 20% of young Americans kill themselves. Depression is the number one risk factor for suicides in young people in the United States.
In addition, 1 in 12 young people aged between 15-24 years will decide to commit suicide because of depression after their partner left. So it's important for parents, friends, teachers, lecturers, and other relatives to recognize symptoms of depression in someone.
Young women are also a group that has a high risk of depression, compared to older women and men of all ages, including adolescents. Sadness, anxiety, and negative emotions are felt more by young women. A study says as many as 43% of college-age women aka college students have trouble sleeping in a few months because of a broken heart or breaking up with a lover.
There are steps you can take to avoid depression when you face the end of a love relationship.
Talk to the former
Susan Heitler, a clinical psychologist in Denver, Colorado, told Empowher, one of the best steps to having depression after a broken heart or breaking up with a lover is to visit a therapist or psychologist. But there are a number of other things you can do to erase some of the pain you feel.
Heitler advises people who have a broken heart and experience depression to try to communicate again with their ex.
"Do this so you can say what you think, share your views about the relationship that just ended, and this can help your recovery process. So when you do it, not only do you complete unfinished business, but also give input to each other, "Susan said.
If the ex-spouse does not want to meet in person and cannot be contacted by telephone, sending an e-mail or letter can also be helpful enough to complete your unresolved feelings.
Dispose of all prizes from the ex, if necessary
Although it's a bit cliched, according to Susan, one way that is also quite helpful in avoiding depression because of a broken heart is to get rid of all the presents from the ex who have memories for you both.
"This is also a way, like‘ Okay, this is the end of a period in my life, and I'm preparing for a new life. ' That thought can give you a feeling like you are in control. Maybe it's not like that, but it can help you avoid depression, "Susan said.
However, many people have different reactions and choose to store items from the former in a certain place.
Motivation of the mind to not be depressed
Mental development psychologist, Deborah L. Davis, Ph.D., in her writing at Psychology Today, says that people who are depressed because of a broken heart must strengthen their minds.
Deborah also mentions there are some assertions of thoughts that you can do, such as by instilling the following thoughts:
- My suffering is the result of a chemical reaction in the brain, and I'm not crazy. My brain chemistry is just being out of balance for a while.
- Just because it's broken, doesn't mean our relationship isn't real.
- I should give space to respect his wishes.
- Stalking doesn't solve the problem, just make it shy.
- I am a person who continues to grow and develop, and can learn from this experience.
- I have to respect myself and behave like someone who takes care of honor.
- The more I behave like a normal person, the more I will feel like other normal people.
- To avoid focusing on relationships that have ended, I have to focus on other things in my life and make them better.
- I have to focus on what gives me energy to live, not things that drain my energy.
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