There are many things you must prepare before marriage. Ranging from clothing, catering, room decor, to message places. In addition to all that, it is not uncommon for a bride to be suddenly hit by doubts and fears of commitment. Because, being committed to living together is made for a lifetime, not just for the next 1-2 years. All stress related to this marriage can be mixed up and ultimately make you anxious and nervous about the D-day. How do you deal with nervousness before marriage?
Is it natural that I feel nervous before the wedding day?
Reporting from Web MD, Jeilyn Ross, MA, LICSW, CEO of the Anxiety Disorders Association of America said that feeling nervous or afraid before marriage is normal. Many brides who experience it.
Feeling a little stressed can actually encourage you to focus more on doing a task, to take action, and solve problems. For example, worry about wedding invitations not arriving on time. This anxiety can motivate you to plan to select invitations, to look for designs, order them, and send them early. So on, stress can spur yourself to work better to reach an unforgettable wedding.
But when you get overwhelmed, heavy stress can cause your appetite to decrease, sleeplessness, difficulty concentrating, to a more sensitive and irritable mood. It's not impossible that heavy stress can also make you become obsessed with all the details of marriage or paranoia all planned to fail miserably. This is what needs to be more vigilant and avoided.
How do you deal with nervousness before marriage?
In order to be stressed and nervous before marriage does not continue to become depressed after marriage, there are several ways you can do it.
1. Chat with people you trust
Don't underestimate the power to vent to deal with stress. Kate Wachs, PhD, a psychologist from Chichago as well as a column in Relationships for Dummies, advises every bride to chat with family members or close relatives who are married and trusted. You can also try talking to religious leaders you know and trust.
Tell me what concerns you are feeling right now, including the sudden doubts that undermine you about the relationship with him. Ask for advice from your friends about what they are doing to overcome nervousness before their marriage.
If you want to talk about your nervousness with potential partners, you need to be careful. Make sure your partner understands that your doubts do not mean you want to cancel the marriage.
2. Spend time with your partner, but don't talk about marriage
Even though both of you continue to be overshadowed by all the trivial affairs of the party, try to spend a special time to "take time off" and spend quality time together. Take advantage of that time as much as possible to strengthen your inner bonds.
Go on a date to your two favorite places when you were still dating and remember those good times. Invite your partner to exercise together on Sunday morning to take off. Or if you are lazy to go out of the house, make a romantic dinner session at home while opening the old school photo album that continues with the favorite film marathon.
Remember: You may not discuss marriage matters at all . Completely empty your mind of the source of stress during this relaxing time together. Focus your mind on good things about your togetherness with him, rather than thinking about things that are scary or negative.
3. Engage partners actively in every plan
The bride and groom often become "sexy bother" to plan every detail of the wedding. But be careful, burdening yourself with all the stress can cause the anxiety that you feel is getting worse. That's why planning a wedding should also involve a joint decision.
Susan Heitler, PhD, a clinical psychologist and marriage and family therapist in Denver, said that anxiety and anxiety before marriage arise because there is something that needs more attention. Well, maybe you can't see it with your own eyes. By involving a partner, you will get a new perspective and a fresh strategy to solve existing problems.
At this time also you can confide with your partner about your worries regarding your party and your life. Discuss carefully in four eyes and make a plan to overcome this problem.
Couples who can work well together will strengthen each other when faced with stress ahead of marriage, said Heitler. Conversely, couples who do not work hand in hand are more susceptible to severe stress nearing H-days - even if the couple really love each other.
Remember, marriage means you must be prepared to live life like a partnership. That is, you must be able to share happiness and problems without one party feeling disadvantaged.
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